PDN Article: April 6. 2013
Raising
children in today's technological world can be quite exciting and daunting at
the same time. Technology offers us wonderful opportunities for personal
improvement and advancement as a society in many areas of our lives. At the
same time, technology could be misused and become destructive, creating various
social ills. For example, deceitful activities -- stolen identity, pornography
and cyber-bullying, among a few.
Our
children today are growing up in a world extremely different from the world of
their parents and grandparents, different in how they were raised and the
technology they were exposed to.
Children
today have no clue as to what a manual typewriter looks like and how it works,
nor about RPM record/stereo systems, or the old washing machine with a wringer
type that our older generation is nostalgically familiar with. For someone who
grew up during the period of manually operated appliances, the experiences have
become a meaningful and memorable part of one's life.
Technology
widens the generation gap between children, teens and their parents. Children
as young as toddlers are able to easily manipulate iPhones, iPads and other
systems. This also is a time when many of our young people are being cared for
and raised by their grandparents, and many grandparents are clueless about what
these technologies are, what they can do, and what our young ones are doing
with them.
Although
some parents and grandparents may be technology savvy, many are not.
Although we
have become technologically advanced, the basic key ingredient to raising
healthy, responsible and independent children is still the traditional way --
the way most grandparents know. That is to love and discipline in a firm, consistent
and respectful way.
The task
and process of raising a child is like tending to a garden. Before you plant,
you first prepare the soil to ensure a healthy foundation where the plant will
grow. As the plant grows, you nourish it with water and fertilize it regularly.
Every now and then, it will need to be weeded out and the soil irrigated.
As the
plant grows, its branches need to be trimmed, pruned and cut back, and it even
might need a stake to lean on to prevent it from bending and going astray. If
you ignore and neglect the plant over time, it will not thrive. The plant would
eventually wilt and die.
This is no
different than raising a child. He/she needs to come forth from parents who
would be there to ensure a healthy and safe environment from which to grow and
develop, with lots of tender loving care, nourished with family-positive values
and traditions, proper discipline and guidance. Limited settings, restrictions
and timeouts are necessary to keep the abundance of overflowing energy of a young
person tamed, productive and meaningful.
Raising a
child is not an easy job, for it requires plenty of attention, time, patience
and positive role modeling early on, and sometimes throughout lifetimes. The
result of the dedicated care a parent gives to raising a child is, however,
rewarding, a blessing and a legacy to pass on.
Annie
F.B.Unpingco, LCSW, is administrator of I Famagu'on-ta, Child Adolescent
Services Division at the Department of Mental Health and Substance Abuse.
